Transfer??

Okay, so it's been a really hard couple of days. As per my previous post, I was waiting for a call back from the doctor's office to tell me what "strong" meant for my fertilized babies :0) They explained that the 5 were right where we wanted them to be cell count wise, but that they were not sure if I would transfer on tues (3dy) or Thurs (5dy). She said if I had had 10 eggs she would know certainly it would be a 5dt and if I only had 2 or 3 if would be a definite 3dt, but because I was on the cusp with 5 she was not sure and that she would call me at 7:30am Tuesday to tell me what to do. At exactly 7:25am she called to tell me that they had not grown as well as she was hoping and that the RE wanted me to come in and discuss our options. Oh, yeah did I tell you that I was completely freaking out and crying all day Monday?!?!?! It was so weird. I am not feeling negative, just over protective.

So, DH and I go to see the RE who tells us that he recommends waiting for the 5dt so that he can clearly pick out the strongest ones. Right now its just a crap shoot. As of Tuesday, we had 3 that were at 5 cell and 2 that were at 4 cell. They should have been at 6 and 8 cell...so they were a little behind. My Mom made me laugh cause she said that of course they were lazy, they were mine. And, she also joked that there is always drama surrounding everything we do, why wouldn't our kids be the same way! LOL That made me laugh. She is so funny. But, anyway, the RE said that that was his recommendation but we had to understand that the consequence could be that none would survive til Thursday. UGH!!! He gave us the option of being aggressive and putting all 5 in yesterday, or just 4 or just 3 or just 2, but said that he wouldn't be able to give us any sort of success rates or really any info because he just does not know. We decided after deliberation to wait til Thursday. So, we go tomorrow for the transfer at 10:15am. The RE told me that they will not look at them until Thursday morning so as to not stress them out anymore. So, we shall see what happens when we get there. This is insane!!! It is amazing to me how fragile life is....day by day, hour by hour and minute by minute.